Date sent:        Thu, 24 Jul 1997 10:48:42 -0700
To:               arthurhu@halcyon.com, bettyhu@hotmail.com, carlhu@microsoft.com,
        davehu@aimnet.com, shwang@previewtravel.com, eileenh@yakima.apple.com,
        72630.3457@compuserve.com, georgehu@microsoft.com,
        cathsm@microsoft.com, jhu@efit.elcm.eds.com
From:             urology@whidbey.net (Janet Tipping & Ben Hu)
Subject:          fw: humor


>Astrology tells us about you and your future simply by your
>birthday.   The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of your birth.
>Demographics tell us what you like, dislike, whom you vote for,
>what you buy and what you watch on television.
>
>*** Well, the Corporate Zodiac goes a step further: simply by
>your job title, people will have you all figured out...
>
>MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid.  You chose a marketing
>degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead
>on drinking and socializing - which is pretty much what your job
>responsibilities are now.  Least compatible with Sales.
>
>SALES: Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing
>without a degree", you are also self-centered and paranoid.
>Unless someone calls you and begs you to take their money,
>you like to avoid contact with "customers" so you can
>"concentrate on the big picture".  You seek admiration for
>your golf game throughout your life.
>
>TECHNOLOGY: Unable to control anything in your personal life,
>you are instead content to completely control everything that
>happens at your workplace.  Often even YOU don't understand what
>you are saying, but who the hell can tell ?!   It is written that
>the Geeks shall inherit the Earth.
>
>ENGINEERING: One of only two signs that actually studied in school,
>it is said that ninety percent of all Personal Ads are placed by
>engineers.   You can be happy with yourself: your office is typically
>full of all the latest "ergodynamic" gadgets.   However, we all know
>what is really causing your "carpal tunnel"...
>
>ACCOUNTING: The only other sign that studied in school, you are
>mostly immune from office politics.  You are the most feared person
>in the organization; combined with your extreme organizational
>traits, the majority of rumors concerning you say that you are
>completely insane.
>
>HUMAN RESOURCES: Ironically, given your access to confidential
>information, you tend to be the biggest gossip within the
>organization.  Possibly the only other person that does less work
>than marketing, you are unable to return any calls today because
>you have to get a haircut, have lunch, AND mail a letter!
>
>MIDDLE MANAGEMENT/ DEPARTMENT MANAGEMENT/ "TEAM LEADS": Catty,
>cut-throat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain
>at your current job for the rest of your life.   Unable to make a
>single decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of
>meetings you can schedule for yourself.  Best suited to marry other
>"Middle Managers", as everyone in your social circle is
>a "Middle Manager".
>
>SENIOR MANAGEMENT: Catty, cut-throat, yet completely spineless, you
>are destined to remain at your current job for the rest of your life.
>Unable to make a single decision you tend to measure your worth by the
>number of meetings you can schedule for yourself.  Best suited to
>marry other "Senior Managers", as everyone in your social circle is
>a "Senior Manager".
>
>CUSTOMER SERVICE: Bright, cheery, positive, you are a fifty-cent cab
>ride from taking your own life.  As a child very few of you asked
>your parents for a little cubicle for your room and a headset so you
>could pretend to play "Customer Service".   Continually passed over
>for promotions, your best bet is to sleep with your manager.
>
>CONSULTANT: 666.
>
>TECHNICAL WRITING:  You never had to study in school because all of
>your classes were either common sense or involved reading stories.
>You are in this field because you really want to be a famous author,
>but you have to pay the bills in the meantime.   Ironically, all of
>the techno-speak you have picked up since working with the Technology
>geeks has completely ruined your vocabulary, and the documents you've
>written have drained you of any and all creativity you may have once
>had.  Least suited to marry an engineer because they are your mortal
>enemies, but you probably will end up doing just that.
>
>
>
>